What we create from the chaos of our lives is dependent on how we bear our suffering, fears, and doubts. For life requires us to be stubborn as we reach towards our higher selves. Our stubbornness is a willingness to continually and forever evolve. While crafting, within our hearts, a petition to resist the temptation to quit. To say yes to life is not only meaningful under all circumstances but it is also possible under all circumstances.
We reach this place of internal equanimity by aligning ourselves with the actions that bring us closer into ourselves. Addressing our fears, anger, and doubt in order to heal from the simultaneous damage of the world and the pain that has been self-inflicted. Anais Nin, throughout A Woman Speaks: The Lectures, Seminars and Interviews of Anais Nin, teaches us the importance of responsibility, and being nourished in order to meet our many obligations. Admiring the women that would became spiritual mentors, and guides along the journey towards mastery–Anais Nin On Destiny says:
What we call our destiny is truly our character and that character can be altered. The knowledge that we are responsible for our actions and attitudes does not need to be discouraging, because it also means that we are free to change this destiny. One is not in bondage to the past, which has shaped our feelings, to race, inheritance, background. All this can be altered if we have the courage to examine how it formed us. We can alter the chemistry provided we have the courage to dissect the elements.
Our lives require us to balance responsibility and introspection, a balance between action and pensive thought. We cannot move around the world, lovingly, without deciphering the bulwark between our higher selves and the anger, doubt, and hesitation preventing our growth. In order to be liberated from these paralyzing emotions one must confront them whole-heartedly. Anais speaks on the uses of our pain saying:
When human pain has struck me fiercely, when anger has corroded me, I rise, I always rise after the crucifixion, and I am in terror of my ascensions. THE FISSURE IN REALITY. The divine departure. I fall. I fall into darkness after the collusion with pain, and after pain the divine departure. Confront all the angry thoughts, feelings, the jealousies and condemnations, to find their cause, seek the root of such feelings and then operate on that. Need of security and reassurance can cause criminal acts.
With a Buddhist lens of creating freedom through enlightenment Anais believed the only path to ending suffering is removing all obstacles to our internal life. Every person in this society has a responsibility of creating a more livable, communal, and loving world. I watched a construction worker rip a homeless man’s tent from the ground, and I wondered when does our humanity step in for our preoccupations. While this homeless man does have personal responsibility, he was actually coming home from work when it happened, I wonder can we create a world that values humanity more than social positions. However, we cannot wait for a change of heart, and those willing to dive into their souls must began living from the inside and love the people in their communities–Anais says:
I am only responsible for my own heart, you offered yours up for the smashing my darling. Only a fool would give out such a vital organ. We cannot always place responsibility outside of ourselves, on parents, nations, the world, society, race, religion. Long ago it was the gods. If we accepted a part of this responsibility we would simultaneously discover our strength. A handicap is not permanent.
Anais Nin On Destiny speaks with warmth and urgency on those themes which have always been closest to her: relationships, creativity, the struggle for wholeness, the unveiling of woman, the artist as magician, women reconstructing the world, moving from the dream outward, and experiencing our lives to the fullest possible extent. Continue reading Anais Nin on the importance of faith.
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